Favourite artists

Some I like (to be added t0) ...

Linzi Mauger
Zdzislaw Beksinski
Julian Beever
Tamara Lempicka
Anish Kapoor
Sina Pichler
Banksy
Hundertwasser
Tracy Emin (pencil drawing of an owl in a tree - why didn't I buy it??)
John Piper (his churches)

Transgender - strength and vulnerability

Transgender people: mentally strong with an underlying vulnerability? Or vulnerable with an underlying strength? TG people often seem to have both in some measure. True, the same could be said of all people, but TGs seem to have a healthy dollop of both. The strength comes from putting up with the misunderstanding and compromises. The vulnerability is really the same as anyone else's, but with an added willingness to let it be seen. May be this comes about because people who identify as TG often have a mixture of so-called 'masculine' and 'feminine' traits in good measure.

My experience
I am gentle but still mentally strong. Showing the so-called 'feminine' side has nothing to do with weakness or being a coward. Strength has nothing to do with gender. On the contrary, women here are increasingly seen as strong. But that doesn't yet apply to a more 'feminine' man, even if he has as much strength, or more, than the woman next to him.

Pleasing people

Setting out to please oneself all of the time, one loses friends and contact with humanity. Setting out to please others all of the time, one distorts one's soul.

Agnsotics

There are three sorts of people who call themselves 'agnostic'. Those who believe that agnosticism is the intellectually sound viewpoint. Ditherers who cannot make up their mind or who are too afraid to commit themselves. And those that don't give a s**t but occasionally have to declare themselves to get those who do care off their backs.

Self-care for counsellors (quotes)

Kennedy & Charles, On Becoming a Counsellor

Often the counselor's self is left behind as though it could safely be overlooked or disregarded in view of fulfilling an ideal of service to others. A failure to listen to what is going on inside ourselves, under the banner of heroic self-forgetfulness, may increase our experience of stress and place a heavy mortgage on our effectiveness. (p.68)

Tolan, Skils in Person-Centred Counsellingand Psychotherapy
Looking after ourselves, knowing when we are depleted, being able to provide self-nourishment, are important for all therapists but perhaps particularly so for the counsellor working in an organisation ... (p.168)

The nature of our work means that we are "giving out for a large part of the day. Supervision, theory and all forms of professional development are ways of "taking in "- of laying aside other people's concerns and focusing on our own needs . However, it is equally important to be playful, to have activities that are not worthy or even meaningful beyond the simple pleasure they give us." (page 169)

Feminism - thoughts by a man (3)

It is open to eveyone to create and shape values in this world. It is open to every man to show respect for women.

Feminism - thoughts by a man (2)

Why is it so troublesome to some men who call themselves 'pro-feminist' that some feminist women want nothing to do with them? They have their reasons! Why not simply work with other men, on reducing male violence or whatever; or with women who are happy to work with men?

Conversely, if you are working with men / boys only and claiming to be pro-feminist, then yes it is essential to keep in touch with women's perspectives, or else how can you know whether they consider what you do to be of benefit?

That said, I do think that feminists who want men to support the cause are often far from clear what role they think men should play. And that confuses 'willing' men who haven't yet decided for themselves.